A reflection on fear of swings in kids
In hindsight, I realized that it was me who was terrified of swings and not my little one. It's always good to reflect on why we do what we do and how it may impact our kids.
Yesterday, my friend held her boy tightly on the swing.
It reminded me of me always holding my one-year-old in the playground.
We started taking our little one to the park when she was about a year old. Initially, she would see other kids play from a distance. Then, one day, she moved toward the playground and pointed out that she wanted to swing.
But we could not leave her to her own in the playground.
We used to hold her even on the simplest equipment, like slides. It was only after months, when we realized she was better off without us, we let her play on her own.
But yesterday, when I saw my friend holding her kid on the swing, I began to think, is the kid actually scared of the swing?
Or is it that we are terrified of leaving them alone?
Whose fear is it? Ours? Or our Kids’?
In my case, it was my fear.
I have fallen from swings multiple times and have gotten bruises, and I certainly didn't want the same to happen to my child.
Also, I wasn't sure if my kid was ready for the swing. Will she hold the chain while she's in the air? Will she stay seated?
So, I kept holding her in the playground for months.
Today, when I think about it, my girl was probably ready to fly the day she moved towards the swing. It was me who was not letting her try.
So, how do we know the kid is ready for the swing?
Signs that you can let your kid alone on the swing
The first sign is that the kid shows interest in the playground. She may smile, look at other kids swinging, and point towards the swing to take her there.
Some playgrounds have swings explicitly designed for toddlers that snug and secure them. If your child is enjoying it, not crying when you swing them up high, then that's the second signal that your kid is ready for it.
However, not all playgrounds have such swings. The one I go to has a swing for slightly older kids. It's a platform swing with chains secured in a frame. It doesn't look safe for toddlers, and that's one of the reasons why I was initially skeptical to let my little one swing alone.
Nonetheless, if your kid wants to swing, let her.
You'll know she's ready for it only when you let her try independently.
My one-year-old had seen other kids playing; she probably had already learned how they were holding the chain, and now all she had to do was apply those observations.
Gravitational insecurity and the fear of swings in toddlers
Some kids actually dread swings or any other play that involves releasing the feet from the ground. For instance, my friend's daughter dreaded jumping on the ground, from the couch, etc., until she turned two.
It's called gravitational insecurity, which one can overcome through practice.
However, such experiences could also be associated with the fear of any swinging objects (Pendulaphobia) or hypersensitivity to moving objects. Therefore, it's best not to force kids into something they're not comfortable with.
What if the fear of swings develops after a fall or an accident?
A friend of mine, when she was nine, was hit by a swing (another kid was swinging, and she was standing close to him because of which she got hurt). Since then, she has developed a fear of swings. Even today, she doesn't feel comfortable near any swinging object.
Such instances are unavoidable. However, kids often fall, get hurt, heal, and get over it most of the time. Younger kids especially tend to forget things easily. Remember how easily they forgot their vaccination shots?
The point is that we should not let fear surface in our kids' ideas of playing. If they fall from a swing or get hurt, help them overcome it through positivity. Instead of saying, "Don't go near the swing, or you'll get hurt," we can say, "Be a little more careful near the swing."
Concluding thoughts
Many times, the fear is within us and not in our children. Unintentionally and unknowingly, we pass on this fear to them through our words or gestures.
The fear of swings is just one of them. Don't know how many such fears we instill in them inadvertently.
We need to be mindful of what we say to our kids and how we act in front of them. Only then will they grow into fearless beings.